i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
