You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
