Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Randomize
