I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
