I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
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