Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
i was born a porn star she said
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Randomize