some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
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