i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Randomize
