White coat. Heels.
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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