so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
He did a backflip because drugs
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
