wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize
