You work out of a Hotel?
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Randomize
