She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
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