Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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