She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
