I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Randomize
