my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Randomize
