I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
