Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize