I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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