Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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