: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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