Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
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