I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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