she kept yelling 'call me bella'
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
