when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
I am available for nakedness
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
