i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
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