Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
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