i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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