Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
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