are you still at the devil's house?
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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