There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
