Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Randomize
