I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
jump out the window naked night went bad
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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