Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
