Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
