I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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