he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize