You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Randomize