so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
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