Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
stop calling my apartment porn island.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Randomize
