I showed him my bush... on skype.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Randomize
