Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
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