DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
I didn't notice because vodka
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize