I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Randomize
