Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize
