god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
do herpes really smell.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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