It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize