I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
Randomize
