I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
